I have no particular affinity for strip joints. They are reason number 12 why I'm glad I don't have girls. The last time I visited one was about 7 years ago for a mates stag party. They are a fantasy world that often brings out the least in people. That said, when I was 18 and in Guam I gladly swam in that fantasy. Try and tell an 18 year old that he shouldn't go to a place where he could drink beer, play pool and see boobies. There is a difference to being 18 and 40. If your 40 and still going to strip joints, just stay at home and play Dungeons and Dragons with your mates and I'll have more respect for you. I thought if I would go to one now, I'd want to know how I could make the most it, in my own way. So, I've come up with my Top 5 Most Awkward Songs To Get A Lap Dance To. I don't want to be there, the girls don't want to be there, so let's make it as uncomfortable as possible. So here they are:
5. Macarthur Park - Richard Harris "Someone left the cake out in the rain"
4. 2112 - Rush "20 minutes of Geekitude"
3. Once in A Lifetime - Talking Heads "Same as it ever was, same as it ever was"
2. I'm Gonna Be (500 Miles) - The Proclaimers "And I would walk 500 miles!"
1. Luka - Suzanne Vega "No Comment"
Naturally, I made a playlist in case your not familiar with the songs or if you want to put your man off lapdances for the rest of his life.
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