I too will not be meeting with Dalai Lama

I'm not into conspiracy theories normally but here's one for you. This week Prime Minister John Key decided against meeting the Dalai Lama. Recently, the Australian Prime Minister Kevin Rudd also elected not to meet with the Dalai Lama. This was not long after Barack Obama decided that he too would not be meeting with His Holiness. Wow, this guy must either be very controversial or have some severe halitosis. I'm sure it has nothing to do with pressure from China not to meet with the man. Now here's the conspiracy, John Key has worked in Asia as the head of Merrill Lynch's foreign exchange and met with the Dalai Lama when he was in opposition but now refuses to. Kevin Rudd, who speaks mandarin by the way, has met with the leader of China, Hu Jintao, 5 times since coming into office but won't meet with stinky ole Dalai. Obama (can he go by one name now like a Brazilian footballer?) has a half-brother who lives in China, who is busy promoting a book right now. Never mind that the US owes the Chinese like a trillion dollars in bond debt, he doesn't want upset his new friends and affect book sales.

Now, I've also decided to follow example and I have decided that if I ever have the opportunity to meet the Dalai Lama I will choose not to. If he's in the shop buying smokes and I come in I'm just going to pretend that I didn't see him and go down the back where they keep the milk and wait until he's gone. If he comes into a bar that I'm at, I'm just going leave and I guess I'll find another place to go. If he rings me up to go out, I'll just say that I'm sick or something and that we'll have to catch up next time. It could get a bit awkward but what's the man ever done for me? I mean, can I get shitty tools that work only once before they break from Tibet? No. Can I get pyjamas for my kids that spontaneously combust in Tibet? No. How about kids toys that contain lead paint or toothpaste that contain arsenic? How much does tainted baby formula that kills kids cost in Tibet? I bet it's a lot.

These are tough economic times and it's a dog eat dog world out there. OK maybe that's not a good metaphor but they used to say that a healthy US economy was good for the world economy but these days it's a healthy Chinese economy that's important. I'm mean, where are The Wharehouse, Walmart and Hema going to get all their shit from. It ain't Tibet.